NEW YEARS

Last year I came up with a complex list of New Years resolutions - 1 for every month - and I don't believe I met a single one. No one ever does, right? It's this stupid ritual we have for ourselves. We begin the year as failures. So instead this year I have come up with resolutions TO FAIL. Yes, I have picked the things I will fail at so that I may learn as much in the next year as possible so that I can graduate as the wisest woman in the world. I am setting myself up for failure and I am very excited about it.

1. Commit to a doomed-to-fail relationship. Rather than talk myself out of being with someone, I will talk myself into it. I will commit to someone I don't like and see what I can learn from that experience

2. Open myself to an unsuccessful theatrical endeavor. This year, I will not worry one bit about how my Broadway Melodies set will be recieved. I will not care about the overall quality of the piece. It will merely be for my own fun

3. I will drop a class. I always stick with the classes I take even if I am miserable because I HATE to quit. It's just the same as a failure. So either this semester or next, I will pick my least favorite class and drop just before the drop deadline.

4. Fail to hang out with friends if I do not want to. Often, I have no desire to spend time with others. I LOVE to be by myself. Somehow this is unacceptable in college. Plus I always feel very guilty if I blow off my friends for no real reason. This year, at least for a month, I will only be a good friend when I feel like it

5. I will fail to call home. My efforts to be a good daughter are futile so I will try my hardest to not be and see how that goes

Of course, I am not serious about any of this. But it would be interesting to be a bad girlfriend, director, student, friend, and daughter on principle. Ha. It really would be a great experiment - part of me believes this lack of effort would actually improve my life. It seems to work for a lot of fuckface bums I know. hmmmmmmmmm